Dating post mastectomy
I feel a little scared that things are moving so fast. When I see him the next Wednesday, I sit on the wrap-around bench inside his boat and reach for him. He takes the whole of my left pinky finger into his mouth. *He’s been gone, away at work, in a different state.He says, “Take all the time you want.”During that week we don’t see each other, I take a planned trip to Victoria. “We’ll just have to find other parts of your body that are still sensitive. He traces the arc of my right hip bone as I lie on my side and says, “I could draw this.”I feel at home here with him.“You’re like an injured bird, but a survivor, too,” he says. When I see him for the first time in two weeks, it’s late evening.Welcome to the second installment of Rachel Joy Horn’s tried-and-true-and-possibly-resulting-in-a second-dinner-invitation DOs and DON’Ts of dating post-mastectomy.Since writing my first post in November, I am still single.It’s my first date with the boat captain, and I’ve already told him I’ve had early-stage breast cancer, a double mastectomy and reconstructive surgeries. It was his coat and his no-nonsense manner that first put me at ease. on Friday, I was sitting in a Lake Union oyster bar when I saw this tall, ruddy-complexioned man enter with a ready smile. It’s the middle of winter, a clear, freezing night and our fingers are getting numb. Then we kiss in the parking lot, our cold noses touching while a man in a passing car rolls down his window and yells, “Get a room! It’s got the prime slip spot, furthest out with an unobstructed view of downtown Seattle and Gasworks Park.I’ve also told him some of the good stuff — about my recent, post-divorce New Year’s trip to Costa Rica where I zip-lined, spotted baby monkeys and sailed on a catamaran. I recognized him from his profile pictures and noticed he was wearing a pea coat. At 8 p.m., after four hours of drinks and appetizers and dinner, we vacate the table because another party is waiting. Just outside the restaurant and feet from the lakeshore, a circle of Adirondack chairs surrounds a roaring fire pit contained by wired-in stacks of oyster shells. I reach over to the arm of his chair to hold his hand and pull it under the scratchy wool blanket on my lap. Inside, it has a wooden steering wheel, a galley, a salon, a bunk, a head. He has crafted the interior woodwork, he has drawn the framed miniature sketches hanging on the walls, he has read all of the books lining the built-in bookshelves.
Women with early-stage breast cancer were more likely to survive if they had ‘breast-conserving’ surgery and radiotherapy than if they had a full mastectomy, the researchers said.Women have been offered breast- conserving therapy, also known as a ‘lumpectomy’, for years.But researchers have been divided over whether it is the best option.Their findings could mean thousands more women could keep their breasts following a cancer diagnosis.The study of 130,000 patients – the largest ever conducted – found certain women were up to a third more likely to survive if the offending lump alone was removed, rather than the whole breast.